Escaping from Strange Gods

REFLECTION


When I was still a child I could still remember the days when my entire family went to Sunday mass to pray. In that moment of experience in my life slowly build-up and able to develop my own personal image of God, my own understanding of him personally, but since I am a child it is just an image of God with no meaning of it, just a strange ideas of him, Perhaps not only by going to the church every Sunday that I know the image of God but rather also every time my mother would always asked us to pray the Holy Rosary every day. Even by praying the rosary sometimes I fall asleep under my mother’s feet with the rosary in my hands. Oftentimes I used many excuses in order for me not to attained the rosary because for me it is bored and “sakit mag luhod” as we have many excuses but our mother really force us to say the rosary, indeed we have to “kay kung dili me bunalan man me” So in that experience “bahala ug kapoy” we pray together. In such manner I did not even notice that by praying the holy rosary is a one way my deeper relation of God grows, it is a stepping-stone of my faith in him. Until then I nourished this relationship of mined with the Lord and years passed I responded it by personally making my self an offering into a life to priesthood, as a priestly life would have.
However at my present life would tell me for the change of I personal perception of an image of God. Now my knowledge of God widen to consider him as a provider, provider of everything even though before when I pray the rosary and fall asleep but still he provides me with a good and nice parents who able me to understand such situation in life and there in moment of crisis. God always provide me everything I asked of him and he knows what the best for me, which increases my faith to him. Not only as a provider but rather a heart that able to forgive sinners, as I grow up many things had happen and many things also have done, but somehow there is a God who ready to forgive, there is a God who ready to love and comfort in times of sins committed.
Moreover in the seminary everything have been taught personal, emotional, social, spiritual dimension of a person, for more being a mature person mature not only by a physical aspect but in spiritual maturation mature in faith in God that able to stand a God’s given faith. With all this things able me to acknowledge the different images of God, before only one aspect of my image of God that I know and with the help of my parents, but now through my own faith to God it give more ideas to have a different images of God. Every person has its different ideas of God, the god who punish the sinners, the god who doesn’t need love, the god who doesn’t care about people, the god who not desires human happiness, the god who say, you will pay for that, has no emotions, the god who is specialist with souls, with all this things even we have different images of God but the most important is our faith in him. Different in our approaches to God but it does not count in the real sense, what is the important is how we believe in God, how we have lived our own faith in him.


The Heart’s Hunger


REFLECTION

One of the books of Bro. Andrew Maria, MMHC on Parcels on Truth that I read years ago about “God knows best”. The story goes like this There is a certain poor widow had to take four different jobs and work for eighteen hours a day just to provide for her children. Her only consolation was the love of her children. They were aware of their mother’s sacrifices and were devoted to her. One night, she was so overwhelmed by her difficulties that she could not help but cry out to the Lord. Lord she cried, I’ve been praying to you for so long and still you have not answered my prayers. A voice answered her, what have you been praying for my child? Please put an end to my poverty, the woman replied so that my children and I will no longer suffer. Child the gentle voice continued your present suffering is what is best for you. Accept it as my will Lord she complained I know what is the best for me. If only you’ll do what I ask, you’ll see. Make me rich she answered give me money and property. The voice did not answer. When the woman opened her eyes, she found her self in a mansion in front of her many chests of gold. The Lord had made her very rich. So every one enjoy until one day she received news that her children were in trouble two of her sons were in jail her only daughter had eloped with a married man. She prayed once in the Lord. Lord she whispered weakly, I wish you did not grant my prayers years ago when I asked you to make me rich. Now you know the voice answered, why I don’t grant all petitions. Believe me child; I know what’s the best for you.
As I read through out the article of Bro. Andrew I was moved into self-realization, which able me to discern, cause somehow it has also a significant into my life where I always bother to asked God for something more than what I expected in life. Since my childhood days one of my dreamed is to finish my studies and got a stable job in order to help my parents. Indeed after my studies to proceed to become an army as what my father is. Perhaps I really force my self to commit my self to apply in that certain profession. But in the end everything has change of what I dreamed and expected for. Before for such matter my vision in life change when I decided to enter in a priestly life, offering my self to God. But with this decision that I have I never regret having this as my profession in other sense. In fact this is my personal decision because I know God did not give to me the things that I asked for, the things which I plan for he knows what is really the best for me.
With this path that I choose make me happier than the life that I choose before if ever I have it for I may able to nourish my faith in God, my own heart to love him more, I know this is the life that God wants me to be he did not want that I may able to perish in the battle if ever I became of what I dreamed but he wants me to be with him in the other way by of serving him. Serving him as pastors of souls, he really knows what’s the best for me, what is really suited in me I know I have the hunger heart to achieved those vision in life before, but by the help of God he knows everything, he knows what is good and not good for me. As I lived this way of life I may increase my own desire to love others as what God would asked me to do in this certain vocation, able to catch more faithful believers and to convert more Christians by nourishing faith in him.